Disorientated

Today’s mathematics test was horrid. A high possibility of failure is predicted. See, algebra and factorization are invented by the government to control the general populations. By forcing millions and millions of mindless sheep into pointless treadmill education systems and engaging their cognitive abilities in imaginary concepts such as algebra, the government ensures that subversive actions are kept to a minimum amount due to the over-utilization of brain functions. The same goes for all the subjects I’m bad in. This worldwide government conspiracy was probably initiated through a joint Masons-Illuminati-Semitic-McDonalds-Nazi-Microsoft-Communist-CIA-KGB-ISD-NSA-Uncle Sam and his nephews-FBI-MI5 effort to make the citizens of this planet too confused to bother about anything else and too stupid to consider the fact that McDonalds sells overpriced pieces of crap… that taste soooo good.

I shall now present my points.
1. McDonalds’s are all over the damn place. Due to the brain-washing system that we call education, the people’s minds are already irreversibly damaged. These money-fat brain-dead zombies then proceed to throw their money at McDonalds, thus furthering their plans of world domination and children molestation.
2. That homeless guy near my house said so. Homeless people have never attended schools, (or so I was informed) therefore their brains have not been corrupted. That is why they are the number source for reliable information on governmental conspiracies.
3. WW2 was a sham. Hilter never did have a moustache!!!
4. George W. Bush is the president of the United States. Enough said. (refer to brain-dead citizens above)
5. The US Army cancelled the Commanche programme. DAMN THOSE BASTARDS!
6. If you fold those little pamphlets that the government likes to hand out in schools enough times, you can form the message “FerpoarfGemopeationasePoeaWmang”, which I suspect is some kind of coded message in a secret language that they have developed to communicate their little conspiracies. Efforts are still being made to decipher them.
7. My SCV Broadband is capped at 128kbps upstream. This makes little sense and I can see little explanation for it, other than CONSPIRACY! *cues conspiracy-type music* Seriously, how the hell can I say that I’m using broadband on IRC when my shitty upload stays at a blazingly fast speed of 2KBs. I get faster speed if I write ones and zeroes on a damn piece of paper and send it by pigeon carriers. (Each pigeon will carry one packet of data and redundant packets will be sent via smoke signals to minimize packet loss)
8. N-Gage QD is coming out. Hurray, it doesn’t look like a piece of Mexican cuisine anymore! It doesn’t play MP3 anymore! It still looks like something the dog left and confused about whether it’s a really ugly phone or a really lousy game deck.
9. Iraq War. An important event to remember when one talks about human intelligence and government cover-ups. You might say that I have no physical proof for my conspiracy theory, in which case I’ll say, “That didn’t stop the Americans”. Game, Set, Match.
10. Intel and AMD naming schemes. How in the world am I supposed to tell if my Intel Pentium M Processor 735 is better than my AMD Althon 64 3000+. Apparently NOT using mhz/ghz has become the new “in” thing, ever since AMD started their stupid “xxxx+” crap.
YOU: Wow! 3000+, means 3000mhz right?
AMD: Hahaha, we’re just screwing with you. It’s a lot less than 3ghz.
YOU: Pentium 735? WTF
Intel: ROTFLMAO!!11112 LOLzzXZXz2 112!!!
YOU: *commits suicide*

As you can see from my list of independently-verified (i.e. independently by me) evidences, even the biggest idiot in the world (which happens to be the president of USA) can see that, without a shadow of doubt, I have just wasted away five minutes of your time. Ok, your homework for today’s lecture will be to find out what Illuminati is. :P

Finally, my closing words of wisdom
Aero’s new layout = lolicon
Therefore, Aero = Pedophile
Memorise this equation well; it will be included in next week’s test.