Down with Fat Taiyaki Fangirl!

Yes, Kanon’s animation looks like sex, the voice-actings are good, Kyon Yuuichi doesn’t look like a bastard anymore and the OP and ED don’t suck anymore. Yeah, yeah. BUT AYU STILL SUX!!!

Remember kids: too much taiyaki makes you fat

Today, I coin the acronym FTG, or Fat Yaoi Taiyaki Fangirl! I have already patented this idea and anyone using the term FTG when talking about Kanon owes me $0.10 of royalties!

From this moment on, I shall refer to Ayu only as FTG to show my immense dislike for her and her kind!

Kanon, Aoi Nishimata style!

Why do I harbour such immense hatred for Ayu you ask? Well that’s because I AM A NAYUKI FANBOY! Like, duh! And those annoying little wing thingymonies aren’t helping either!

Let’s take a look at what FTG has as compared to Nayuki:

FTG:

• Taiyaki (it’s a huge lie, just like meronpan)
• “Wings” (probably made in China)
• Yui Horie (not her best work)
• “Uguu~” (GAO!!!)
• Flat (like a washboard)

Nayuki:

• Dojikko (moé!!!)
• Totally awesome alarm clocks (“mou asadayo! okite!“)
• Captain of the track team (seishun no ase!)
• “Kitsune-san!!!” (let me be your kitsune!)
• Hawt mother! (…I mean good genes)
• Neither flat nor fat! (’nuff said)

As you can see from my totally objective and non-biased comparison, Nayuki wins hands down. :3

On a more serious note, Kanon is pretty much exactly as I expected it to be. No surprises so far, which is somewhat disappointing coming from Kyo-Ani. It’s good, of course, and it’s probably going to be one of the best shows this season. But since Kyo-Ani is doing it, why not set the bar higher. We all know that it’s going to be a hit, but will it be big enough?

The animation is awesome, that’s a given coming from Kyo-Ani. The music, however, is the same as the original game soundtrack, which isn’t all that great IMO. I rather they make something better instead of trying to please the hardcore fans.

Most importantly, the story looks like it’s just going to be a complete remake, but with more episodes to flesh out the side stories this time. That, I think, is what is going to make or break the new series. Or rather, make or make bigger, since we all know that it’s going to be a success no matter what.

Kanon Wing!

I don’t think it’s a very good idea to follow the original too closely. I mean I know what they say about not fixing what’s not broken, but really, I don’t like to watch the same stuff twice. Improved animation isn’t going to do that much for the story. I really hope Kyo-Ani has something planned to spice things up as the series progresses. They did a fantastic job with Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu in that respect with the anime-only episode and the shuffling of the episode order. Kanon (2006) needs something similar to really stand out.

Let’s face it, the basic stories told through Kanon have been “referenced” and improved upon by countless other games and anime since the original Kanon was first released for PC in 1999. It was a pioneering game when it first came out, but the impact has gradually lessen over the years. Unless you are a hardcore fan of the original game, it’s just not that special anymore, not unless you have been brainwashed by the Internet hype machine. Sad girls in snow are not enough in today’s changing world.

So, what is my suggestion? What is the one thing that can and will rekindle Kanon’s spark and once again fortify Kyo-Ani’s position in the history of animation as one of the Greats? What is this black voodoo magic that can cure world hunger, cancer and AIDS all at the same time? The answer is so simple I can’t believe Kyo-Ani hasn’t already done it:

HAWT MAI X SAYURI YURI LOVE

Surprisingly, Sayuri is actually the seme

It is Kanon’s only hope! You know it is the truth!

P.S. Please let Nayuki win this time… ;_;